AL weekend

I've been meaning to look at this blog for months...I finally did it. It took me an hour to read it all so that I was caught up. There's a few little things that I want to say before I get into the weekend we stayed with Papa while Mom and Gerry went to Alabama.

I think Papa may have had a TIA ("mini-stroke"). His speech is worse, he is definately more agitated than he was just a short while ago, I've seen some of the staring y'all have described. But I try to remember that he is 80 years old and his brain has not gotten the work-out it's used to. He used to check his e-mail, read, lots of things other than watch TV. Although he DID watch a fair amount of TV. But his brain isn't getting the stimulation it's used to. It's also not getting the oxygen it should and you'd be amazed at the things that happen when a brain is deprived of oxygen. He's probably depressed too. He's probably sick to death of his "situation" and the only person he can really take it out on is Gama. You know that old saying "You always hurt the one's you love the most"? Same thing. He fools with his hearing aids because it's something to do. I have racked my brain to think of things for him to do. I've tried to get him to play Scrabble or a card game with me but he wasn't interested. He can't see well enough to read or work a crossword puzzle. Even WITH the mega-glasses I got him. So alot of times I just sit with him. We won't necessarily talk, although sometimes he does get chatty. But I'll sit on the love seat and every now and then he'll just look over at me and smile. That's how I know that even if he's not always the big teddy bear he was when I was growing up, at that moment...when he winks at me with both eyes (you know, the big blink he does) or smiles at me or calls my name and doesn't say anything or my personal favorite, calls me Princess...I know he's still Papa and my heart just smiles. Or breaks into a thousand pieces. Or both.

And Gama. What's there to say? We all know her memory is not what it used to be. And that she wanders around the house or lays on the couch and reads the paper all day. But I have to remind myself that she's 80 years old too. That's why I really wanted her to get out of town for the weekend. And I think she needs to do that once a month or every other month or whatever. Like when we went to eat at Rio Bravo (isn't that where we went) while Papa was still in the hospice. I think she liked being with everybody and kind of forgetting all the other that's going on. Even though you never really "forget" it. She won't stay gone for long...no matter how they might fuss, she won't leave Papa for very long. But she needs a break too. As far as her dementia, I've heard of Aricept although I can't remember if it's a med for dementia or full blown alzheimers. Maybe I need Aricept! I think it would be a good idea if someone took over or at least helped her with the finances. She may be resistive to it, but let's assure her we're not trying to take over, but just help her because she's got a lot on her plate. Maybe she'd be more receptive to it when put that way to her.

My plan is, now that things seem to kind of routine and gas is $4 a gallon, to come up for the weekend or a long weekend every month. I wish I could be there more, but don't we all. My house is a wreck...I have weeds as tall as my house. I have to work one weekend a month, which means I don't really have a weekend. And like everybody else, I'm tired. I'd feel compelled to come more often if it weren't for Chantal being there. Good grief, where would we be without her? And now that we've handpicked our weekend crew, who could ask for more?

I meant for this to be a post about staying with Papa while Mom and Gama went on their roadtrip, but it's getting late and this post took on a life of its own. Well, I promise to write about it this week. I've waited over a week to do it at this point, what's a few more days?

Hope everyone is doing well. Miss and love you all!
-lauren